Dear Louise Column - July Edition
Dear Louise,
My husband and I have raised our 15-year-old son with self-awareness and an understanding of the world. We have been tolerant and open-minded.
But lately, oh, it hurts to even write this, he has joined the "Cloakers", that group of individuals engaged in the illegal practice of wearing disappearing cloaks!
At dinner, he argues vehemently for their cause.
We have told him it is illegal, and under no circumstances should he join in their nefarious activities. We have told him if he quits we will let him get a new tattoo. We have offered to send him to numerous space concerts. But to no avail.
And half the time we can't even find him . . .
We need help.
Just sign me Vision Invisibility Impaired
By Louise Farfel
Dear Impaired,
I feel for you.
But you know, it may be your opposition to this that is fueling his behavior. He may be getting off on the shock he causes you.
I suggest you ignore him for a few months. When he sees he is having no effect on you this new escapade may lose its' magic for him.
If not, you could take more drastic measures. You could tell him you and your husband wish to join as well. This seems to me to be a sure cure.
If that does not work, well, I don't want to say it, but you may need to consult an outside intervention agency.
Always, Louise
Dear Louise,
As I came back from the bathroom at work, I caught a fellow office worker licking my glasses.
These glasses were very expensive and one of those new flavored glasses. I admit it had a wonderful taste, chocolate and cinnamon, but I would never lick anyone else's glasses.
This prank will cost me dearly. I need to throw these glasses out and buy new ones.
How can I prevent others from licking my frames? Getting a taste like fried liver? Adding a garlic smell to them? Or maybe tea tree oil?
But why should I suffer just because they can't control their tongues?
Geez, Louise, what do I do?
Too Tasty in Tennessee
Dear Tasty,
You don't say whether you need those glasses or are wearing them to be taken more seriously in the office.
At any rate, I ask: where is your pride?
There must be consequences to actions. Make your office worker pay for your new glasses, and I guarantee you won't have to worry about others partaking again.
Fried liver indeed! You get the flavor you want, and you make sure everyone knows you are charging that worker.
Always, Louise
